Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Let Me Love

As of recent, I have noticed my loved ones being particularly concerned with my well-being. My mother and best friend, especially, worried that my way of thinking will only bring me pain. That my way of loving will always cause me to be the one that hurts or one that cries. I know it's your protective side. I know you care about me and want what's best for me. I know it hurts you as well when I am hurt, but isn't that a part of love? Why is it that you hurt when I hurt? Is it not because you love me? Love hurts...not all the time, but the truth is.. it hurts.
Please trust me, believe in me, and continue to love me. I ask you to please let me love as I wish. Promise from the bottom of my heart, I am not here to disappoint you nor myself. I fully believe in what I am doing. I just know from deep within my soul what I'm doing is right at the present moment. Trust that I will learn on my own. Trust that I will correct myself if I see flaws in the way I choose to love.
For my best friend, do you not remember how rocky our friendship was in the beginning? Do you not remember how much I lacked in my capability to love anyone other than myself? Yet, you still chose to love me and I'm certain it caused you pain. I am truly sorry. But imagine, what if you decided to stop loving me? What if you gave up on me? Undoubtedly, I would not be the friend that I am today. It was your patience and love that touched my heart. It was your love that changed me.

Do you see? I was once that selfish person you may consider undeserving of love but your love transformed me into a better person. I don't want to be anyone's savior. I don't want to change anyone. I just want to point out that nothing but beautiful things grow from love. So let me love. Let me love endlessly as you have loved me. Yes, I will hurt and very likely...I will cry, but everyone deserves a chance at love.

On a less serious note, I'm sick and my mom won't let me eat any watermelon. Little does she know when I sneak into the kitchen, I always stuff my face..BAHAHAHA Does that woman not know how much I love WATERMELON!?!! Crazy ladyyyyy...

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