Thursday, July 1, 2010

A Time for Change

I stared at my 5 year old xanga homepage, saw how utterly outdated it was, and decided it was time to move on. Can't say I won't go back now and then, xanga will always hold a special place, I practically grew up with it. But like everything else on this evolving planet, things simply change. Whether it's the blooming of a flower after a rain shower, an infant crawling one minute and walking the next, the strange disappearance of the dessert you swore you hid in the back of the fridge or--me. As scary as it sounds, I have come to realize that my life is going through a time of change.
In a nutshell, I recently ended a 5.5 year relationship, lost a couple of friendships, and on top of trying to finish off my undergraduate degree, I'm also going through my medical school application process.
I would say the most life-changing event would be my newly single life. Friendships come and go, and I knew that darn medical school application would roll around before I know it so though it's a change, it was expected. Not to say I didn't know the relationship would end, because I most definitely saw it coming. I just didn't realize how hard it would be adjusting to the single life. I went from seeing my significant other 5-6x a week to nothing. Now it's just me. I eat alone, I watch tv shows alone, I sleep alone...everything. I don't remember the last time I went to Wal-mart, because I don't want to go alone. Well, that's the single life, being alone. Hey, some might be perfectly fine being alone. That's just not me. Humans are social creatures by nature and trust me, I am not one to deny my natural desires.
However, during this time alone, I've found that keeping myself busy is the best coping mechanism. Summer school, MCAT, and friends have kept me consistently busy. I am most grateful to my friends that have been there for me. I might have lost a love, but found something much grander. I also found that the single life is a great time to focus on improving yourself. With more time,I can do things I hold off like exercise and church events.
And though the loneliness may be at its worst at night, I simply fall asleep and wake up to a new and brighter day.
As much as I would like to resist change, the best part about it is adaptation. Watching myself adapt to my new environment is quite an experience and I'm excited to see what's in store for me. Here's to change....and a new blog 8)

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